So, I spoke to my mate Ken the maitre d yesterday……….well……………..when I say spoke we, of course, used the e mail thingy but we had a good conversation. We have been friends for many years and I like to think we are very, very similar. We are both are very...

I have never been much of a fan of parties. Maybe this comes from the fact that I was hardly ever invited to one and when I was…………….no bugger spoke to me. I would arrive at the party with dreams of meeting a girl ……………any girl…………...

I love food………………I really do. Last night I ate at what some would describe as a “fancy restaurant” and I will explain the point to all this in a moment…………………. But first let me tell you what was on the menu. I started with...

Birthdays are crap. Mine no longer tend to herald exciting parties and the greedy shredding of wrapping paper. They are now just mileposts that point the way toward the inexorable arrival of old age and incontinence. Because I’m an increasingly maudlin fellow, I tend to treat other people’s...

Monopoly has no end. The rules explain how you can unmortgage a property and when you should build hotels on Madison Avenue but they don’t say, and they should, that the winner is the last player left alive. And what about Risk? You make a calculation, based on the law of averages, that you can take...

I remember the first time I went to see a basketball game. I was 25 years old and went with the cruise director of the Carnival Fantasy, Gary Hunter, and entertainer Tim Harkleroad. We drove from Miami where the ship was spending 10 days before her inaugural cruise……………...

With everything that has been happening, I haven’t had time to tell you about the huge success of our “Fun Ship” Halloween parties. The guests took part with great vigor and reports are telling me that some of the costumes were outrageous ………………………...

It has been well documented in past blogs that I have a hatred of flying, climbing walls, the French and …………….dancing. And is the thought of the later that has finally made me decide not to attend my high school reunion in December………………also...

It’s Saturday and I am enjoying a real weekend for the first time in 6 months. Heidi is pottering about and I am sitting here in the kitchen having just welcomed home my underwear which returned from a vacation in Rome………….and they didn’t even get me a gift. The British...

I would rather blow torch my nipples off then work in a bank ….but it looks like they may have got their act together…..so yippee for that and now, hopefully, we can start leading normal lives again and start worrying about SARS, Bird Flu, North Korea, Iran, whether to cruise on the Carnival...